Category Archives: My take on the world in general

Hmmmmph – day 2/30

My initial thought was to have a post with some deep thoughts 😀 in it. However, I have been annoyed and irritated for most of the evening. 

All I can think of is smart retorts to make the person see what an idiot they are behaving like. In my head – I have had at least a 100 conversations with the lady where ofcourse I am the cool and collected person and she comes off as being the illogical woman she is. Hmmmmph!

My irritation reflects in my cooking with my white sauce for the pasta being lumpy and my potatoes refusing to bake.

I want to be able to not let myself get rattled.

I want to be above all of this. 

I hate the amount of mindspace I am giving a person who is a nonentity in my life.

Being an adult sucks, my son would have resolved such an issue with a whine or a complaint to the parent of the offending party, a whack or a tantrum. And with that he would feel better.

But here as an adult, I got to suck it up. 

Or do I now?

The doorbell rings and the tall one walks in.

Within 10 mins I have told him everything. I have whined cribbed and presented my case. The man listens patiently and says a couple of sentences. And i mean a couple of sentences

In a bit – the angry cloud rises from my head, I can laugh at him pulling his moms leg, even my potato bake seems like it might be edible.

Everything in the world seems a little better and big boss comes on. Time to watch other people have problems now 

Forever etched in my heart – Day 1/30

When I started blogging, I did it because I wanted to record my life. For sometime I did it pretty religiously too. But somewhere down the line I realised that while I can crib about my life, make fun of myself and the ones I love, write a couple of senti letters – I find it difficult to write about the little moments that fill my heart.

The first time I stopped blogging was when the elf was born – I never found the words rather I didn’t want to find the words to express what I feel for him. It was a private moment to be savoured by me and that was recorded in my heart forever.

When Swathi forced, I mean suggested that we do a blogathon, my first thought was to write about the amazing Diwali I had – the warmth of friends and family, the pang of missing some family, the traditions I was passing on to my son, the joy of cooking favourite foods of family and friends, the fun of dressing up and all the gratefulness I feel for everything. 

But like always I don’t find the words to do it justice.

Just a heart which feels all warm and loved. For everything I dislike about organised religion, I love how it still binds us irrespective of our beliefs. So I am grateful for that and glad we persist in some traditions.h

Jai Nuttie Mata ki! 

Oh good! Now you can spend time with the elf.

What made you leave your job now? After he is 3 years old.

Don’t you feel it is so much better for the elf that you quit your job?

If you were the random aunty or those “holier than thou human beings” I would smile and say yes. While I seethe inside. Do people really think that a mother would do something which is not good for their kid as they are implying me going to work was. Do they really mean to imply that I was being selfish because I chose to work over staying at home. 

How do I explain to them that I am not a bad mother nor do I love my kid less  because I felt no guilt at going to work. Don’t get me wrong, I had my days of guilt, my days of wondering If it was all worth it – but on an average I was happy! 

I don’t believe in living in guilt. I have always maintained that the elf was my priority and the day I felt that the elf was suffering or I was suffering because I went to work I would give it up.

I don’t believe the elf is better off or worse off because I worked for the first three years of his life. Online you will find all the pros and cons to working mothers. So I am not going to elaborate. 

Coming back to me – No, I didn’t quit out of guilt. I didn’t have a eureka moment 3 years later that I horror or horrors sent my kid to a daycare. 

I quit for me.

I reached a point where the next steps in my career in the banking sector didn’t ignite a passion in me. I felt empty. I felt I needed to do more for my soul. 

Sure being at home would make things logistically much easier because the elf had started school but that wasn’t my primary reason. 

The main reason I quit was me.

In India, for a woman the word ‘me’ is taboo – you always quit because of marriage or kids or parents or because your husband changed locations. 

But imagine a mother saying she chose not to work to find herself . 

Quitting for yourself is tough to explain. It’s tough to tell people that today if I find something I am truly passionate about I would go back to working. Sure I will look for more flexibility because I wanted to spend more time with the elf but yes I want to go back into the workforce. 

I have realised I can’t explain myself.i explain myself to the ones that matter. I think they see my view point. But to the rest of the world I am ok being the “good mother”

Beta good thing you quit. See elf is more friendly now –

Yes Aunty – all for him!

Now everyone say Jai Nuttie Mata ki! 

(Loosely translated to All hail mother nuttie) 

U is for Ullu

I am an Ullu  – for my non Hindi readers Ullu is an owl! 

Say hello Finland, Russia and Mauritius and oh you from Australia too. I see you !! 

Of all the talents the Ullu has – the one I wanted the most is the ability to swivel my neck 360 degrees. Just imagine what fun I would have if I was standing in a bus and someone got too close, I could just turn 180 degrees and stare at them right back! How freaky and how cool would I be.

Anyway, instead of that my only ullu-ness ability is being a nocturnal animal. It’s ridiculous !  

I really really want to sleep early. Yo know be those ideal early to bed and early to rise types – the ones who have a high pony tail at 6 am and are all ready to run. Instead I go to sleep when most of these enthu cutlets are waking up.

Don’t think I am not aware of the conspiracy theory. The world is keeping me up to ensure the safety of the world. You know make sure it is spinning on its axis the right way or make sure the ghosts are staying in their own universe. And as a responsible citizen I stay up. So as the world sleeps I do night chowkidari (night watchman). 

The husband will not let me read before I sleep because apparently the light affects his precious sleep. The elf makes the afternoon conducive to mama taking a short 15 min nap so that she won’t sleep early again. This is the time when he raids the fridge for chocolates or pours out all our lotions into the sink.

And you tv programming people, I spend the whole day wondering what to watch on tv – how the hell do I find stuff after 11 so exciting. Why are you doing this to me.

And mr jobs – smart phone huh? I am on to your sneakiness. And yours to fb, Twitter and Whatsapp creators. And all you iPhone game creators.

Aaand ooooh my friends who so cunningly have placed themselves all over the globe so there is a constant chatter on Whatsapp whatever be the time.

The Atozchallenge creators – hmmmmph! And to all of you who influenced me to start this – hmmmmph and hmmmmph. Wait till May when I will sleep early once this is done. Someone else can look after the world between 11 to 330 then. 

This is my entry for U in the April  Atoz challenge and i am officially losing it. 

T is for traveling with a toddler

Long long time ago, there was a blog called wandering feet. An enthu nut thought she could manage another blog on travel –

There was one blog post. Over the 4 years of existing – this post had 2 views

And so here goes this post when we travelled to Australia with our 19 month old .

Flying with a toddler

You must be crazy or very very brave!

That’s what we heard every time we told people, we were planning to holiday in Australia and taking our 19 month old toddler with us.

For us the decision to travel to Australia was easy. Since the Elf got to travel free until he was 2 – we decided the place to holiday was the one with the most expensive air ticket. And Hence Australia won!

On October 1st, like all good travellers we informed everyone on Facebook that we were off to Australia. The Elf was taught to say “YAY” every time he heard the word Australia and video of the same was promptly uploaded by his besotted cool mother.

And so it came that one clueless toddler and two ‘slightly’ nervous adults got into a flight.

Did i say a flight – sorry i lie.

We took the Air India dreamliner to Australia – A Mumbai – Delhi – Sydney – Melbourne flight – yup you got it – 2 stop overs before our final destination because we are THAT brave or just THAT dumb!

Air India seems to be have conspired with the toddler and attempted the “Divide and Rule” policy. They overbooked our existing seats and attempted to give us seats that were not together on the longest leg between Delhi and Sydney. But Ha! we caught onto the conspiracy and promptly put on our saddest faces while asking fellow passengers to have pity on us and let us sit together.

And of coursing adding to the excitement was the delayed landing on the Mumbai – Delhi Flight resulting in a marathon run from the domestic terminal to the international terminal with the 10.5 kilos of wriggling mass.

So the Elf was fine on the flight, and was very excited about us being in the sky. Everyone of the flight was duly informed that “Plane is in sky” over and over again because everyone knows that everything should be repeated a billion times in toddler land.

The Husband and I on the other hand – had our limbs just a tad bit full with a wriggling active child who thought bouncing around the flight was extremely amusing. And what’s funnier than knocking over dinner and watching mama clean dal and rice from the Carpet.

The elf then stretched out across the mother and father and slept – we sat still out of fear of waking him up. . And of course we slept, just to be woken up in fifteen mins to be served dinner!

So since i am the crazy brave mother who flew with her toddler to the another hemisphere, here are my tips for surviving a flight with a toddler

-> First off and the most critical – Praise God that a certain Mr Jobs existed. Of course the ipad. While we would like to believe that we are those parents that limit screen time, Lords Knows we prayed that BAA BAA BLACK Sheep would never run out of his wool.

-> On the flight, carry like a million pairs of clothes because your kid will try to outwit you and require just one more than what you have carried. And the really smart would carry a change of clothes for themselves.

-> Carry food for your kid – lots of snacks, milk, food- Air India at least doesn’t cater for the food requirements for non seat occupying babies and will give you a meal “only if there is any left over”. And no the food is not baby friendly. Thank God, i was struck by some form of wisdom and had plenty of food

-> Do take a bassinet seat – your limbs will thank you. While we didnt have one while going to Australia, coming back we got our bassinet seat and it was the best thing ever. The todd was slept in the bassinet with his feet sticking out while the parents fervently watched movies – only another parent would understand why i use the word fervently.

-> And Relax – i truely believe babies & kids feed off your energy!

->And the most important rule of them all – You will never see the people on the flight again

This is part of the April Atozchallenge and my post for the letter T

R is for (Wait for it, like really wait for it) Rain

Call up any Bangalorean (or are we Bengalurean’s?) – anyway so call up any Bangalorean you know.

And if they don’t whine about the temperature, they are lying to you – they don’t reside in Bangalore. It has been hot hot hot here. And no not the pampered weathered Bangalore hot of 32 degrees – it has been close to 40 degrees here.

In a land where a lot of people don’t have AC’s –who needs AC’s for 2 months of heat machaa. This is a big deal. You sleep and wake up with sweat around the neck. The husband is kicking around acting like someone is attacking him at night, the kid still insists on getting his stuffed toys to bed, in this weather, the toys are even more annoying than usual.

The air is still, warm and the sun is blazing.

As I wonder what to write about with the alphabet R – i start some half hearted attempt at R for Romeo and Juliet and know its going nowhere – and then just like that God sends me a sign

Thunder!

I think this is how people marooned in deserts feel when they see an oasis. I get all excited and inform my Bangalore Whatsapp group and the husband that it is going to rain. I ponder updating a Facebook status. But that’s not cool anymore!

If you think i am over-reacting to the prospect of rain, you must know I am a great lover of the rain, especially the first rain – I have blogged about it here and here. Rains make me very excited – It is probably a left over thing from living in Port Blair. Where every evening, the minute we got out of the school bus, it would pour drenching you irrespective of any attempts of having an umbrella or a raincoat. I realize all my love for the rain has already been pored into the blog posts linked so I will shut up about it.

Maybe the rain is just an excuse at a valid excuse of eating chai and samosa.

Anyway getting back – I hear the thunder and immediately I thought of R for Rain. And then of as a harbinger to the rain, my curtains start moving in the breeze. The same curtains which have been brought to a standstill by this very still weather are actually moving. I get a little more excited and believe I can smell rain.

The people I have messaged tell me I am imagining it,The skies have no black clouds, and even as I right this blog, the breeze has stopped. In fact it’s still again. Dammit even the sun is shining again.

But i believe the rain and I have a connection and it wont fail me – I tell them with all the authority and confidence I don’t actually possess that it will rain and to have faith.

So Rain help me save face and rain!

Rain on this poor drenched Bangalore.

Spare us from buying AC’s and contributing to global warming.

Dont let us become puddles.

And more importantly (for me) make this idiot (me) continue to believe that we have a connection.

Phew and one more blog done – 8 more alphabets and 5 more days. I am not sure if i am more keen for it to rain or for this blogathon to be done with.

update: I am Nostradamus – it just started raining

This is part of the ATOZ Challenge and this is my entry for R. 

 

 

Q is for Que Sera Sera

So since things have been quiet since Thursday, you must have thought that nuttie quit the blogathon.

I have no qualms in admitting that I am in quite a quandary about what to post about Q. She has already questioned the need for Q’s existence and she has well questioned

I could maybe talk about the elf who is a quintessential toddler but has his quirks and sometimes amazes us with his quips. Maybe i could give some wise quotes on the question before every mother – quality over quantity of time spent with the kid ?

Maybe I can give you a quiz but if we differ on the answers it could end in a quibble or a quarrel. Or i could give you a questionnaire and get to know you better, quantitatively at least.

Or i could narrate incidents where over eating of almonds and moong dal halwa made me queasy and since then i have quelled the need to ever taste it again. Maybe i should tell you about the querulous lady who quarreled with me after she jumped the queue.

Or maybe i can write about the quagmire my mind is in this whole quest to discover myself and happiness.

But ultimately i always tell myself Que sera sera – whatever will be will be, the future is not ours to see.

This is part of the AtoZ challenge for April and this is my entry for Q.