Monthly Archives: September 2011

Black Magic Woman

I have always suspected i have magical powers and over the last week i have proof. So you who is planning to take panga with me…beware! Unfortunately these magical powers only work in troubling people, i haven’t been successful in doing any “good” yet.

So on Friday, my colleagues and i went out for lunch and i drove everyone to the nearby mall. One of the guys – lets call him RA, kept making fun of Swiffy Reddy (my red swift for the ignorant). Yeah Swiffy reddy is now old and a lit bit of her seat stuffing is coming out – but she is my baby and hmmmph to you who are mean to her.

I made a passing comment to RA about not showing off just coz he has a new sparkling car…Guess what come Sunday – he goes shopping, comes back and finds a BIG dent on his car and an even BIGGER SCRATCH!!!

of course i laughed my evil laugh…what did u expect from the ‘angelic nut’

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Anyway so i warned the Tall one about my powers but of course the man paid no heed. The next morning, he had to awake early for a call with the US. He woke up with multiple alarms, i tried – i really tried hard not to smack him for that (See how nice i am!). The man awakes to find that his call has been postponed and he can’t go back to sleep.

Also at that point of time, he thinks i look “pet-able” and it is his birth right to come and try to “pet me”…I tell him very nicely to pls get lost…but no he persists – I get up and yell! (hello, morning sleep, stubble, cranky nut – what do u expect?). The man is scared and goes off to make tea.

My sleep spoilt, a very cranky nut wakes up and demands to be entertained. The Tall one refuses. The audacity of the man i tell u.

Anyway, while drinking his tea, he spills the tea on himself. After much dancing around and commenting on how critical parts of his body had been missed, he finally heard a giggly nut tell him to go put cold water on his “burnt” body.

Screaming and with a lot of drama the man goes to the bathroom and attempts to open the tap. As with most comedies, the shower comes on and drenches.

The Nut is entertained!!!
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Dont take panga with me i say!
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In other news, isn’t the late pataudi just so hot – Why Saif do you have to look so much like your mother. The Husband is not even taking offence to my open leching because of the senior patuadi’s age…

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An open letter to the terrorists….

Terrorists,

So you struck again – this time the National Capital. Yesterday, i spent a lot of time thinking about you thanks to all the 9/11 documentaries on TV. I still remember the fear i felt during 9/11. The fear abated as i thought of it as America’s problem. Then the fear during the mumbai train bomb blasts and the fear during 26/11. 26/11 changed things – once the fear went off, it was overcome with anger – a lot of anger at you, the establishment, the general apathy of our government and at us the common citizens.

A lot of us had a lot of hope – hope that things would change post 26/11. Somehow we would be more secure but u managed to prove that we were wrong – nothing changes. Status quo.

Now i don’t feel angry when i hear about a bomb blast. I don’t feel scared. I have accepted it as one of the ways that humans die – much like heartaches. I just pray that no one i know is part of it and move on with life. We are at work the next day, we don’t continuously watch the news, we know the pattern – intelligence failure, Chidhambaram will condemn the attacks, Manmohan Singh will condemn the attack and promise to take stern action against anyone who threatens India’s security, Opposition will use this as a weapon against the ruling party, Some politician will put his foot in his mouth and we the common citizen will call people we know to check if all is well. And then a couple of heated conversations and we are done!

Ok So my point is this – killing innocents Indians is not really helping you either. You See the government doesn’t care about me. My death will not matter. It will not get u back Kashmir nor will it cause Kasab or Afzal guru to be released from jail. Surely you are smart enough to realize that.We are too weak and unimportant to move our government to do anything for us and the government realizes that and makes some noises and we all move on.

I oscillated for a long time wondering if i should write the next para, I feel guilty writing this but then again i need to safeguard myself. You don’t need to kill to get what you want.Kidnap a politician and it works wonders – remember Mufti Sayeed’s daughter?

So use your resources intelligently and stop this nonsense. Our lives are not as important.The only thing you might achieve is reducing our population growth rate.

Regards
A Nut

The Nutty World

So what has been happening with me?

Well we are back from a 5 day trip to Langakwi and while i may not declare this to be among my best holidays – a holiday is a holiday is a holiday and i shall not complain…Other than the fact that i found Malaysian’s very unfriendly, quite unlike their Thai counterparts.

Anyway, that apart…let me think what have i been up to?

Well i have a million half written posts in my head -and none documented. I dont feel like writing, i feel like somethings are to mundane to say, i dont feel like having an opinion or being funny or even writing a book review

Speaking about books – have u read the secret of the Nagas – so recommended. I love Amish’s imagination. i know people who dont like the fact that mythology has been twisted so much but hey it’s his interpretation – take it for what it is.

In other news – i am still existing at work. I feel disconnected from facebook and other social media. I keep in touch with few people and i keep in touch with them a lot!

Ummm…on an irrelevant note, my house – ufff it’s a mess. i have decided i will do one task a day and put this home of ours into order.

I want my life to be a holiday. I want to win a million dollars and never have to work again. I want to find a “higher” meaning to my life. I want to look beautiful, i want to be efficient. I feel i am not living my life fully and just about existing.

OK all that said, do i promise to blog more? I don’t know.